Dear 2007

Hi darling, its me.

Or rather this is you exactly one year later from this date on 31st dec 2006 dropping by to have a lil chat. I know you’ll have a lot of questions for me about what’s in store for 2007- like whether you’ll make it through the year, if you’ll get a good job, if you’ll get to stay in NY and probably the most important question in your mind right now- is this really goodbye? I won’t tell you everything cause you’ll still be bothering chick with all your Jean Gray questions. Instead, I’m going to sit here and tell you what you’ll need to hear.

In the course of one year, you will be given countless talks and advice on how to deal with everything. All of them will mean well though undeniably, you’ll have to take others with a pinch of salt. The only person you should listen to is yourself. Trust yourself babe, you’re definitely much stronger and smarter than you give yourself credit for.

Remember what pap said- your strength is your heart but this is also your weakness. I won’t lie and say your heart won’t be broken this year. It will.. It will hurt so bad that you wonder what’s the point of it all, it will ache to the extent that you think you’re going mad and you will cry even when you think you couldn’t possilbily have any more tears in your body. But cupcake, trust me… You will have a plethora of friends and family who will support you and even strangers will be there to hold you when you’re tired. Its not going to be easy and even as time goes by, you’ll wonder and start questioning everything you’ve once believe in. You’re definitely going to change for sure babe, you will become a lil harder and a lil colder but at the end of the day, we both know you’re going to be just fine. Hang in there babe, we’ll just carry on and see how life goes.

This is going to be a year that you’ll literally have enough material to base a whole TV series on. There are going to be so many tragic ironies, comedy, triumphs and the like that you’ll start to wonder if life is imitating art or the other way round. Just remember that no matter how low you go, good times will come because you believe that they will and you will make it happen. The big catchphrase of 2007 is going to be ’serendipity’. Just when you think that’s the end of one story, here comes another lil twist in the tale. You are going to do things you would have never thought you’ll do in a gazillion years. Maybe its a good thing, maybe its a bad thing- but hey, better to regret something you’ve done rather than something you wished you did eh? This is also going to be the year when you fully embrace New York and move onwards without fear or reproach because when you hit rock-bottom…what else is there to lose right cupcake? You’ll always have me and the family.

Likewise you’re going to learn alot of things, things that you’ve taken for granted or had forgotten over the past few years. You’ll remember why you’re in NY in the first place but you’ll stop feeling guilty for it. Your strengths will be more obvious as the year goes on, in fact you’re going to be surprised yourself by what you’ll achieve in 2007. You won’t get everything you’ve wished for, but you will get everything that’s right for you now. Don’t let it get to your head for as much as it is your hard work and effort, you’ve to remember its those who believe in you and gave you your chance. Take a deep breath and rest for a bit, we’ll have a long way to go but it’s going to be fun.

I know you’re scared of people and relationships. You’re always worried how much you’re pulling or pushing people, your impact on them and how much you can do for them. All I can say is what you’ve always considered your weakness, is actually going to be your strength and what draws people to you. Its ok to be quiet and observe, in fact you’ll absorb so much that it seems surreal how much better with relationships you will be by the end of the year. You will meet literally alot of people from all walks of life and countries, you will gain so much from them and likewise you will be able to touch them the same way. You’re not that big a bore as you think you are. Your attitude to things will change because of them when you realise there is no absolute measure in life. Lighten up, have fun, enjoy yourself, don’t judge.

Don’t be sad when people walk in and out of your life…I know you’ve always thought its a failure on your part when a relationship ends. Sometimes hunbun, a relationship will last only for a particular phase or purpose but it doesn’t signify that it didn’t have meaning. I know its so much easier for me to say this now but trust me, you will realise when you’ve outgrown some friendships. Remember that a good friend is one whom you will feel energized by once you part. If you feel drained or depressed after hanging out with someone, I’ll say see if they’re worth it before making your decision. Pick your battles.

Babe, you will look in the mirror and you will start to see the woman you’ve always wanted to be. Somedays she’s hiding in the shadows and at other times, she’ll be out in full force. No matter the persona, attitude or outfit- trust me, you will feel most powerful when you’re just dressed in sneakers, jeans and a plain tee as you haul up your own body weight’s worth of books up six storeys all by yourself on the last day of 2007. It will be the best of years, it will be the worst of years. It will be a very long year but babe, its time to lift your head up and smile.

Love always,

You

P.S Fine, fine..yes you’ll get a job you’ll love, a place of your own in a fab neighborhood, you’re staying in NY, you’ll have amazing people in your life, you’re stronger, wiser, confident and funnier.. and have the matching wardrobe to prove it!